Womb and Bored

Womb and Bored

Thursday, September 10, 2015

I forgot the teddy bear...



Today, I was walking into daycare with my three children and I looked down to see my two oldest carrying teddy bears.  All the sudden I got this feeling in the pit of my stomach... Holy shit, it's teddy bear day, and I forgot my baby's teddy bear.  I did my walk of shame to the classroom feeling much like I used to in middle school...disorganized, unprepared, and incredibly awkward.  I made sure that my child would have something to cuddle with.  The teacher reassured me...  But, somehow I still couldn't shake the feeling that I was the worst mother ever.

That's when I got a text from my best friend, also a mother of three, and it read...

"Hey, lost all my make up.  If you think about it, can you toss in a little bit of mascara or something for me.  I look great this morning."

True story.

Can I tell you what a relief it was to read those words?

The idea that I'm not the only mess out there was incredibly refreshing and exactly what I needed to hear.

Because, truth is, I'm a beautiful disaster.  I can rock the shit out of a face of make-up and  I look put together, but yesterday, when I was leaving my house for work, I actually stuck to my doorknob.  There was some unidentified substance covering it, and my hand literally had to be pried.

I'm sure it was peanut butter, or jelly, or snot.  Whatever it was, it was disgusting.  So, I tweeted a picture of it and showed it to all my followers.

Okay...I didn't tweet it.  I don't tweet, and I definitely don't have followers.  But, what if I did tweet it?    Maybe it would be the reassurance some other mom needed.  Because, frankly, we are all kinda a beautiful mess.  But people choose the stories they choose to tell.  And, I think we need to be more honest about those stories.

What if we lived in a world where moms were honest.  Where our tweets and status updates weren't about the snow angels we created during our Christmas in July extravaganza complete with hot cocoa straight from Swiss Miss's tit?

What if they sounded more like this...

Today, I didn't shower.  Tomorrow isn't looking so good either.  I might change my underwear.


Today, I was hungover, and I let my child play Wii for two straight hours.  Suck it, world!


I can't adult today.  No way can I adult.


I don't want to join your fucking book club.  If I get a minute to read, it will be pure fucking smut, and you aren't invited.


I think it's great you breastfed.  I didn't.  My child lived.


I drove around the neighborhood...5 times...just to avoid going home because I just wasn't ready to be mom.


Would these status updates have the same impact on other moms as the "I lost my makeup" text?

I love my kids.  I do.   There is nothing I want more than to feel like I'm doing an excellent job.  But, sometimes I fall short.  We all do.  But I am conscientious about what story I tell to the world.  I am like this for two reasons:

1.  I want my good times to be good times because they're good times, and not because they paint a pretty picture of my life.

2.  I don't ever want a mom to question herself.  I think all moms who are trying their best are pretty kick ass.

I think we need to be better about being honest with each other.  Yes, I forgot the teddy bear, but you bet your sweet ass, I gave that baby as much love as I possibly could as soon as I saw her.  Was it tweet worthy?  Probably not.  But what is really?  When is the last time your status was updated with something truthful...with something that made others understand that being ordinary is sometimes extraordinary?

Moms...I challenge you.  Tweet about your disasters.  Tweet about your misses.  Tweet about your forgotten teddy bears.  I assure you, it will up your audience.








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